Using mum's iPhone to blog since I'm studying at living room. Saw the photos, somehow reminded me abt the photos taken that time, same position too and smiles are there. and looking back at all my pasts, they're all celebrating 1.5 years to 3 years anni with their partners -.- amusing thing is, all right after me -.-

anyway, now it's about me.. nothing much, living life happily (:

z im spending my money again cos i saw little miss tees which i didnt get to buy last nite when i was at hougang mall with parents & bro . i saw the stuffs in cotton on, wanted to buy but didnt buy cos thinking of my $ lol. den mum & bro went cotton on but i was up the mall shopping, den my mum called me if i wan stuffs from cotton on, i said i dont want. even if i like the stuffs very much when im with my mum, i dont ask her to buy. everytime i follow her to get her clothes stocks, she's always asking me want this, want that. i said dont want, in the end she always tell the clothes pple, my this daughter dont want waste my money de, everything also dont want de, mummy wants to spend on her, she dont know how to take this chance not like my.. LOL =.= so the clothes im wearing are mostly worn by my mum once, den i wear cos my mum seldom wears them for second time. but since her clothes are matured, i kept buying clothes from online & cotton on. if im out with my mum is to buy her boutique working clothes samples and i'll be trying for her. i never let my mum know what kind of clothes i like or what i want cos i wanna buy it by myself. my mum was shocked to see me buy back bandaged skirts, she didnt know i like hence she asked me if i want the bandage skirt she bought for my sis, i said nope it's alright. working in their office & for the boutique, i can really see how difficult it is, like labourers' job. sian my moda poala shoes white with black bow shoes heels kept dropping out, it's my favourite pair of shoes which i bought for 20 plus when i was with my aunt shopping before cny. But I know everyone got different views abt this.

last fri, stayed back after my school cos my bro has 4 hours break in the afternoon, and im afraid he'll be lonely ma.. my dad also tells me to eat lunch with him which i alr wanted to. i even told him, in the end i waited from 11.30am to 1pm till his class ends, he was eating with his fren -.- so i went to find them.. after that library and my bro tells me to go study and not follow him zz. so i went study.. den 3pm, he came to find me cos his fren got lessons le. we stayed till 5pm in the library den went find my cousin.

/edited
just cant wait for my exams to be over. soon. 13 more days =/ so fast -.-


impression of you totally changed already.

time to change my blogskin. there for ages.

/edited
guess i've to trust in the Lord for my exams and hope for the best. not much time left. had very bad headache yest morning till 6 plus that i decided to take 2 panadols & was fine after that. i can feel that im getting sick soon. ulcers, pain throat.

z nowadays mum seldom cook soup le.. and ive been studying with different frens outside.. spending alot of money. today decided to come home after school cos raining heavily, no mood to study outside lol -.- bought chicken bite set meal, 6 onehs onehs, one bubble milk tea, spent 6 over bucks le just for lunch -.- broke. waiting to work from june onwards! later still need to xfer $ for my shorts & hammies stuffs =/

last sun (18/4) - church wif parents & bro, lunch, grandma's hse till nite. lots of fun at grandma's hse as usual haha.

did this sand thingy with grace cousin at grandma's hse. i still rmb my siblings and i love it alot!

monday (19/4) - went with dad to pet lovers centre at serangoon gardens at 10.50am to send sachi doggie for grooming & i drove there! went to the country club to study with my fren B. at 12 plus decided to buy a drink & take a look at sachi. the staff was cutting her hair & she saw me, after which she kept whining so loudly LOL, kept wanting to come out. the staff was cheesed off & said aiyo LOL. so i faster run away. den lunch at 2.15pm, i went with my fren to see sachi again, her grooming was done & she saw me & started whining loudly again, wanting to come out. my fren said wahlao my fault, in the end the whole street can hear her whining LOL! ate laksa for lunch, went back to study till 7 plus.. dad came, fetched sachi & she was so happy, jumping & licking like mad haha. den went up and down to the car den sat in the car wif sachi while dad went chomp chomp to buy dinner. drove back home.

so called katong laksa.

tues (20/4) - ate maggie hor fun to save money lol. bible study at nite.

wed (21/4) - went out with fren R to study at kovan.. went mac to study.. den ate lunch at yoshinoya. it has been long since i ate there, ever since jc till now.. lots of memories.. bought the terriyaki chicken student meal.. went back mac to study. bought mcflurry to eat. really studied alot that day. home-cooked dinner at home (:

sat (24/4) - was at home studying, but cant study -.- at nite went with parents and bro to eat dinner at hougang ave 5.. den went to hougang plaza novena to look at furnitures. spent long time there.. i love this swing.. kept swinging haha. drove home after that.

sunday (25/4) - church with parents, giant at tampines, lunch there too, drove whole day, den home.. couldnt study also -.- den watched star awards from 5.30pm till 10pm den the party also.. eating dinner & watching star awards at same time, parents cooked (:

ouch, im having ulcers =/
the facts cant get in my head sians.

/edited
wondering what are u doing now hmm.



just saw that you found your.. again, sorry i didnt know hence.. =/ and seeing each time ur even happier, really makes me think the past is really nth much in your life perhaps & whatever time we had was really little due to my personal reasons. anyway it's past le. im happy for you. jiayous!

sometimes i really dont know what my brains are thinking. im so confused =/ i wish exams could be over soon, it's torturing but i hope for more time to study as well.. fruitful day of studying today.

shall update today's & yest's another day.

let the pics do most of the talking.

SAT (17/4)
was home all day long. procrasinating again. den was playing piano again, that wedding dress =.= put dog beside me lol. ate ice-cream, lollipop. etcetc. den wrapped cousins' presents, buffet dinner at cousin's party.

sachi looking at lollipop lol.

was bored, so took picture of the view from living room window.
grace and laura's present.
just took a corner of the dining area at aunt's hse when everyone's waiting for the cake.

swensen's 2.5kg ice-cream cake.

the incredibles!

cousin in middle, with her grandma & family.

my aunt, this handsome boy and me. lol i've been seeing him yearly at my cousin's party, eveyone calls him handsome boy. 5 years old, really handsome. i requested to take pic with him lol and my aunt helped me bring him here lol.

FRI (16/4)

Had school at 8.30am.. wore that floral skirt haha. den was msging bro since he had orientation but too bad his orientation ended late. so took train to raffles place, had my lunch. den my facial & it was free since this month is their anniversary. went home at 2.30pm, bought bubble tea haha. ate ice-cream. maid helped me to do temp straightening. played piano again. bro came home. dad bought dinner back i think, cant rmb.

THURS (15/4)

Had school at 3.30pm. after school at 6.30pm, took bus back. reached hougang at 8pm. was walking to hougang mall, wanna buy dinner & have a look at cotton-on lol & i saw xiang & yin. so went cotton on.. saw the floral bandage skirt, was so happy to see it on sales $7.50 for a skirt, unbelievable lol cos i nearly bought it online. tried 3 skirts and bought 2, decided not to buy the sailored orange/white one. bought that or fillet meal from kfc. home sweet home. dad bought sushi, ate 4..

took pic in the fitting room.

/edited

i admit im getting more and more stressed & emo each day but im glad today i had fun teaching jiamin piano & den playing tennis with her! she's good at remembering the keys.

i ate ice-cream today again at home, it's really nice.. and the way E types really make me laugh, kept laughing non-stop =.= with the *xxxxxx* lol and more -.-

went out studying yest at airport, really love the airport. anyway was thinking thru about how my parents brought us up cos even till now when i leave my hse, i'll let my parents know if im going out to walk or going out to shopping. even if ive informed my parents the day before, on the day itself when i leave hse, i'll let them know whether or not they're at home or in office. since im their first-born, they're super protective of me hence i became sticky to them. i cried when i go for camps, cried when they go on holiday business trips till only jc that i stopped crying -.- and also perhaps cos im the oldest hence there're many responsibilities for me to take on, running errands for parents etc, buying food or cooking for siblings when im home but nowadays due to my exams, my mum despite her being busy, cooked soup for lunch & i just fried some little extra stuffs for siblings, appreciate that & my dad will cook dinner at nite, my parents also inform me about the happenings in the family.. however, im soft-hearted hence i dont grumble or scold my bro harshly even when he makes a grave mistake cos i didnt wan my parents to keep scolding him. im just satisfied with the life i've now, im glad that i dont have to worry about supporting family & as compared to africa, im much better than them so i dont demand much from parents, just happy that ive food to eat & hse to sleep. i just need freedom to go out. moreover, i worked with my parents everyday for 7 months, hence i became even closer to them & that my mum would tell me everything about her boutique stuffs. but there tends to be tension & my sister would help me because i didnt have my own personal time at all even though my mum says i can just inform them & go out but i didnt want to just go out as and when i like though im working for them, i must have a sense of responsibility, so i'll only go out on sunday afternoon. my bad point is not being firm & decisive, i cant be a leader. soon there was a big quarrel in dec, somehow i need to concentrate on my studies alr cos i didnt touch at all ever since school started plus work. plus hammies & doggy stuffs already made me very busy. right now, no work but im studying everyday hence i cant wait for MAY to be over. i cant wait to start my internship.

just applied yesterday for my internship.. applied a few, hope i can be recruited haha. anyway after my exams gonna help out in my mum's boutique first, she's really busy. den i shall start internship in june, im broke cos supporting myself & hamsters too for quite long alr. i still rmb helping out my parents at office and boutique till last year dec due to quarrels =/ but now thinking i do miss working there haha. reflecting back the past again, due to the fact that im quite an introvert hence i dont know much people, so those who entered my life hurt me cos i put my 100% in every single one. i dont ask for much, i just need to be in the guy's heart. now everything is about studying daily -.- ive bible study tmr, glad that it's my 3rd year running, really know the bible indepth, that's good. time to sleep. made some reflections. im proud to say i never exceed my phone bills, not even a cent for a year le since my parents are paying ^^ gonna take up this responsibility when i start my internship (:






















thinking of the past of me and D, how we started though we're worlds apart. i didnt expect much from him cos i know i myself cant meet him often too, once per week or once every 2 weeks & also denying to others about us due to personal problems. I am glad he is understanding towards me due to personal reasons, hence most of the times i went to find him and went home myself cos i dont want him to waste his $ and time to send me home. im understanding and not demanding at all. even we da-bao food from coffeeshop & eat in his room sitting on the floor, it's kinda sweet too. we seldom quarrel cos we give in and take, and i only initiate to contact him and no others. i did whatever i could to make him happy, making & buying many stuffs on vday like gummy jellies forming heart shape, heart-shaped brownie, diy card, styrofoam roses wif bears placed in fanciful glass bottle & on his bday like making mini album+card, folding 268 straw hearts as his bday was 26 aug, adidas dry fit top, iron out heart shapes & his nick with those beads, glow sticks forming his nickname, 12 fancifully designed cupcakes from crystal jade kitchen.. he surprised me with the bear+rings on vday & lovely bears bouquet on bday. i still rmb when he was sad, i went to jp to DIY a cake for him & to bishan to pass to him & back hougang. he bought my siblings and i mac at midnite. he gave me hamsters & bought the rest of the stuffs when i wanna keep them. we went bottle tree park tog, walked around and saw so many interesting stuffs, we even sat the swan ride, super fun. we watched plenty of movies at the beginning, 1 to 2 weeks we watched 4 movies, i kept insisting to pay but he doesnt want den managed to pay once i think. both of us got no time cos im helping and working for my parents that time which includes sat & sun sometimes & he was working for his dad, hence i had hard time to find him. still we felt that it was impt to help our parents hence we didnt quarrel over it at all. thinking about it, we never quarrel much since i was faithful to him, i seriously only contacted him, that's what i do to all my pasts too. i thought i had same views with my pasts, but yet all broke my heart =/ i felt that in a r/s, a couple must trust each other, compromise, talk it out when there's quarrel and solve it, no point flaring up. i never flare up before to them, only cried. and to him, i cried & was angry for awhile but ultimately, we'll sit down and talk. i still rmb everytime, he'll talk those stuffs to me when i was going home, which really touched me and my tears dripped. but everything turned out wrongly, he said he does not deserve me? maybe cos im not his type.

everyday is about studies, either outside studying with frens or at home o: i wish the month of may would come soon but somehow i wish time will pass slowly too as im slow in my revision, im dead :/ just cooked rice just now for bro's and my lunch since mum alr cooked favourite black bean soup. time to study.

and..

seeing my frens so happily in long-lasting r/s, does really make me envy them. it's best if the guy loves me for who i am.

dead tired. blogged one post that day but decided not to publish it. will blog another one some other day. many stuffs took place. complicated.

busy with studies which really scares me off. hope i can survive and i must.

AW sad, they went prawning last nite, and i only found out when i logged in -.- i was like zzz, speechless. i wanna go do many many things like cycling, fishing, prawning, watch sunrise at beach etc.. anyway im dead tired now, came back home at about 11pm. went 21st bday party, first party this year haha. my stomach was really full after eating the buffet food plus bday cake, couldnt take in anymore food. took public transport back with frens after party.. super tired.

it seems like it's drifting apart sigh. im seriously dead tired. feels so weak. my head is so heavy.

things are not getting within my means sigh.

why do i feel so.. maybe i shld just disappear from..

shall blog when ive the time. gosh was shocked to find out yest when i was back from malacca that my revision lectures start today -.- 8.30am till afternoon z. time to sleep now, going to school tmr morning again -.-

many things happened just within 5 months? im glad that everything is over for him, glad that his sister organised many events to bond the family, seeing the pictures make me feel warm & happy. it tells me how impt family is. that explains why my parents emphasised alot on eating together and till now we always eat together as a family most of the days, every holiday trip as a family, every sunday gathering at dad's side grandma's hse with relatives. this bonds everyone up (: anyway back to the topic, i rmbed they organised outings like pulau ubin last time but sad to say i cant go at all due to personal reasons knowing how much i wanted to go hais. anyway i thought thru if i ever get into one, it's best to be an open one, so that i can join any activity organised by his frens or his family. i always wish to do that, but i always have no chance to do that. cherish and treasure the person next to you, u will never know what will happen.

many things took place today, another mind-boogling one. no idea why i became emotional at that time after thinking thru what G said.. i wish, i wish, i wish, everything would work out well.

im back from malacca. shall update tmr. lessons starting, that's boring. i really wish nothing will crop up now like my last 2 years in SIM.

today was home all along. den about 6 plus dad called back, telling me to bring down dog's basket, prepare half container of her food, plus her leash. need to bring her to woodlands to let a PET LOVERS CENTRE staff take care of her cos my family and i are going to malacca tmr till tues! it was a sudden decision, actually wanna go HK for 5 days but i didnt want since i have exams and i really need to study sigh. dad came home at 6.30pm, brought sachi along with him, SAD, miss her. den parents came back at 7.35pm, left with maid and bro.. went aunty hse, left maid there, went to boutique to settle admin stuffs and bring some stocks down.. left at about 8.55pm, went to hougang ave 5 coffeeshop to eat. throughout the journey, the person who takes care of SACHI doggie called and asked is it sachi hates black stuffs LOL. den my mum said yes and the lady said cos her mum wore all black and sachi barked non-stop lol. sachi hates to see light reflections, shadow, dark stuffs, she's racist also LOL. my dad jokingly said cos she herself so black le, she cant stand it to see another one darker than her -.- back to the story at the coffeeshop, 2 guys were sitting there kept looking over our table dont know for what, i was wondering if it's from the where or what -.- den my mum also say why they keep looking over, just stare like that till they left -.- anyway went home after that. started packing my stuffs for tmr's trip! famous hainanese chicken rice balls, Bei zhan restaurant, here i come :0 nights, time to sleep. hungry =/